
Sex scenes, are probably the most unique scenes in a whole book. Every sex scene I have ever encounter this far has its own twist. I figured that when I was writing, the sex scenes would form themselves. Well, I was sort of wrong. While writing, I did find that sex seems to come into the story. However, when writing the scene itself, it gets very confusing to me. This is probably due to me being a male. So what is the best way to write the part where the two lead characters make passionate love? To answer this question at my stage of writing would be total B.S. I can only give examples, of some that I read and what I found were very interesting.
So, I chose a random book out of my collection that I need to read yet and came up with Candace Havens, Take Me If You Dare. I just read the scene where they did very hardcore four-play. I noticed that she uses very seductive words, for example she uses the word growl, and I mean how many women love to hear their man growl their name in the bed. Of course I am a male writing this, so I totally am out of my bubble when talking about these kinds of scenes. I also noticed that she didn’t focus on just one of the characters; she bounces from the two and had you knowing exactly how it felt to each individual involved.
Also, in a sex scene you have to be very thorough in description. For some reason when it comes to these lovely scenes, the reader needs to be able to imagine an almost identical image to the one that the writer is thinking about. Other areas of the book may get a little vague in details so the reader can be creative themselves, but when it comes down to the hard, vibrant, pulsing scenes that draw readers in, you need to be precise. For example, from Take Me If You Dare, Candace Havens wrote, “As he moved his hand over her breast, his other slid down lower to the triangle of cloth between hew legs. The first touch in the folds of softness sent her body pressing into his.” The way she described it, even if it was hard and intense, she spoke softly in the description. There was no grasping or crying in pleasure, the female character just reacts by pressing herself into the male character. That reaction showed the readers how good and intense the sensation felt.
To me the sex scenes need to be more descriptive then verbal. I mean how do you like a scene where the characters said “O baby, that’s the spot.” He fingered deeper. “Right there baby.” There is no depth in that. Here is what I think, maybe instead of being so verbal; the scene could be more like this. Please remember that this is purely from a male perspective.
She moaned in pleasure, thrusting more and more onto her lover’s fingers. She felt the pressure building and felt in total lost. Her cries continued to grow when he whispered to her making his lips vibrate on her clit. She needed the release; she wanted to remember the pure joy of the act. She thrusted again this time, feeling her own wetness on his fingers and tongue.
I am a beginning writer, and to create these kinds of scenes is probably the most difficult for me to do. Basically, I am trying to find ways to make my love scenes into the scenes you don’t forget about. The ones that make you drool want to find your lover. Those are the scenes that make “a book” into “The book.”
I also want to remind you that yes I am a male writer, and my editor, even for these blogs, is a woman, so maybe my scenes won’t end up so male oriented after all. So why don’t you help me and other writers by telling us how do you spice up the book?
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You’re definitely right that each writer does sex in their way, and I think you need to remember that in regards to yourself. Being male doesn’t make it any harder for you to write a great sex scene than it is for any of us. After all, females write plenty of scenes, sex and otherwise, form a male POV, and sometimes we get it way wrong. If you’re uncomfortable or unsure, write your sex scenes from the male character’s POV. Women love to read a man’s POV. It makes us think we understand them. LOL
Good Luck!
Thankyou so much. I never thought that woman would like to read us male POV. I had so many readers come up to me and say I won’t buy a male written book because I don’t want to the male POV. With your experience though, I will stop bombing down on my writing and be more male oriented again. (yay i can grow a set a again).
There will always be readers who won’t read something because of a pre-concieved notion of it. It frustrates me to no end when I hear readers say they hate books written in first person POV. I’ve no doubt that they tried it once or twice and didn’t enjoy those books, and they blame the POV. However, you rarely hear people say they hate books written in third person POV, even though many of us have read books written in that style that weren’t good.
First person POV is just like anything else. It can be done well, or it can just be done. Same with males writing romance or sex or female POV’s, it can be done well. Wanting to improve yourself there is smart, but by no means should you always do it that way if that’s one of your weaknesses. Always play to your strengths, and if the story is good, readers will enjoy it, no matter if a male or female wrote it. (And for the record I’ve heard from readers who didn’t like one a book of mine because it was in first person AND because when in first person they don’t get the hero’s POV, only the heroine’s….)
And of course, no matter how good it is, there will always be someone who says they don’t like it. Which is why it’s so important for you to be happy with what you’ve done.
Make sense?
That helps alot. I know what you mean by it all the way. I have just finished a book, ok gave up on a book, that I love how she writes, but the book just didn’t pull me in.
All books are different, now though that you responded so well I am going to have to write a great article next week.
As a male writer with a noteworthy amount of erotic content in my debut novel THE DARK PROVINCE, I have to agree with Sasha’s two points here. I wrote from the male perspective in the first person, yet most of the people who approach me having read and enjoyed the book are female. I think the key is being honest. For me a good sex scene is an honest one, meaning the character is approaching it not in some surface typical way but one true to them. Calvin Gooding, my main character, is a deeply religious and conservative man so the way he approached affection is true to him from his prejudices to his pleasures. I’m working on another piece (outside the DP series) where the characters are younger and from a much less structured environment than Calvin. I am quite certain when I get to those scenes those truths about the character will show.
Thanks for courageously sharing your thoughts!
Thanks for your note. I love reading your articles. I agree with you on making it true but I think that us writers need to make sure we dip into a wild scene that everybody dreamed of, but are to afraid to do it. And no that doesn’t mean people go break the law.
Excuse my french but, This post makes my mind spin at the speed of dark.
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